106 Comments

So much love Neko. You are my rock. I could never have survived that week without you. Diane would have emphatically said “You ARE fine, Stop it” as we wobbled down that corridor. She would have wanted us to fight against the injustices now and forever. Beth

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Sending love, Beth.

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Thank you for sharing that, Neko. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I want to add something. I'm very alone, except for online friends. I keep seeking positivity and it's very hard to find. So if you (everyone here) do something good, something that contributes net good to the world, talk about it and write about it. Those little pinpricks of hope make a difference to some of us in this very dark time.

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We are here with you, Heather. XO

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To quote DJ John Richards of my beloved KEXP.org "You Are Not Alone".

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Love to you.

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Thank you for sharing your loss with us - a stunning honor walk in and of itself. The beauty of Diane’s organ donation process has resolved an unease I shamefully held and spurred me to doublecheck that I was still registered as an organ donor: I was not! I registered again through the national registry and also added “organ donor” to my phone’s Medical ID so first responders can see that along with my emergency contacts. Thank you, Neko, for leading me to this one simple compassionate act for the day.

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Thank you, Kate!!!!!!!

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I really like these lines from your piece:

Death is not one black, burnt end of a match. It is a wild gift that throws you around and surprises you continually. There are always gifts and insight and portals exquisitely crafted by the nimble hands of death; left on our pillows, in our throats, on a dew covered lawn… A bird who looks you in the eyes and stays too long, unafraid.

I lost my 39 year old son a year ago. His was a "good death" as well in that it was quite sudden and he was really happy. The year has been full of surprises and insights, things that would not have happened otherwise. Of course I'd trade those surprises to have him back but that's not how it all works. I've struggled to explain to others that losing him has also opened doors and connections. I will cite your words to help explain. One of the connections was asking Jon Langford to paint a piece of my son and the friends he made in Cali Colombia where he died. It's wonderful as is Jon.

Your words are rich and inspiring. I'll use the old Irish words of condolence, Sorry for your troubles. Take care, hope to see you next time you come through Chicago

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Diane was such an amazing human. We never got to meet in person, but she sure was there for me in a big way during some tough times. She was the first person I excitedly texted when I picked up a little, smelly, malnourished doggo from the shelter and she immediately responded with a congrats and a todo list. I’m absolutely heartbroken. Sending you, Beth and everyone who was so, so lucky to have Diane in their lives all my love.

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I wept reading your account of the honor walk, and so appreciate you sharing this story of your beautiful friend. Death is transformative for those left living, no doubt. I'm so sorry you have suffered this loss. May her memory live in glory in the lives of those she touched with friendship and with her act of posthumous generosity.

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My condolences on the loss of your friend. As a parent to a young woman whose life has now been saved twice by organ donors, I want to praise her and her family/loved ones for making that choice.

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I’m so sorry. This is all the art of life , pain and beauty intertwined. I saw the honor walk on Croutons IG and lost it. Even though she was a stranger. One of the most beautiful things to witness. I hope all the tears water the seeds of her memory. Unfortunately I can’t be an organ donor anymore but may need some so thanks for always being a positive, kick ass advocate, especially while dealing with sneaky grief.

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A beautiful post for a beautiful soul. One of my biggest regrets is that I never got to meet Diane in person.

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Core friends are everything. Those luminous humans who are there, again and again, without fanfare or a demand for reciprocity. Those humans whose trustworthiness and integrity is never in doubt. Those humans you drop everything for when shit hits the fan, who do the same for you.

My heart to yours, Neko, for the loss of these dear ones. May your life always be steadied by core friends.

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Woooo...that is one mighty remembrance. I've not met you, nor Diane, nor Beth but I will now forever consider you as 'core samples' of my core friendship with Ruben.

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Thank you so much for this beautiful and moving tribute to the loss of your dear friends. I am so very sorry for these losses. On Monday I learned that one of my very dearest core friends, a friend I have known since 1975, has an aggressive brain tumor as well as cancer throughouther body. Your story gave me strength and hope. Thank you for continuing to spread the light.

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this is so beautiful. i am crying. sending love and condolences and awe.

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Neko, this was so sad and beautiful. I was telling Mary about your Honor Walk for Diane but I kept fighting tears. As for Garth, I had coincidentally been recording a version of "When I Paint My Masterpiece," and upon hearing of his passing, Jenny Conlee came over and laid down an inspired accordion track. We wondered at his singular approach to music, and the thousands of magic moments that he left us.

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Oh Neko, I’m so sorry to hear this, and for the loss of your friend. Thank you for sharing this tribute to Diane, and incredibly moving account of your experience. When my sister died her eyes went to two different people in Egypt. I marvel at this. ❤️🤟🏻❤️

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I love to think of where she will travel to and and what she will see in her new life.

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I love this thought.

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I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend, Neko. ❤️Thanks for sharing her story and for the reminder of what we all must do now.

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