The sun is coming up, obscured by long blankety clouds. It has turned cold again after a few days of near fifty degree temperatures. We had a three day mini-spring complete with random fly hatchings and copious fur shedding in the house. My vacuum is one tired son of a bitch. I can’t lie though,
I too have an ADHD brain paired with my husband's AuDHD brain. Honestly, loving him has taught me more patience and compassion with myself. It can be a magical thing to be paired with someone who has some of the same struggles you do (extremely frustrating at times, too).
By the by, I can't wait to hear more of the new album! I am recording my first solo album right now and you are my #1 inspiration, Neko!
As someone diagnosed in adulthood with ADHD and ASD, it’s so great of you to share. It really helps us when we struggle to know we’re not alone, and that there are so many similar folks doing so many amazing things. I already feel like I end every comment with a huge and sincere “thank you”, but…thank you. That goes out to Jeff and all of the creatures as well. ✌️
The speed of the passage of time is something that really gets to me when I think about it too much. The physicists will tell you time is an illusion, that everything that will happen has happened already and will happen again. The author of Ecclesiastes seems to agree with them, more or less, so they may well be right. But the IRS still wants my tax return by April 15th and I still miss the baby versions of my children. And when I go to the dentist, the minutes turn to hours. It’s not fair.
You’re so right on about the speed of time this year. Weeks fly by like nights. I’ve never experienced this. Maybe it has something to do with turning sixty. SIXTY!
Who? Me?
Monday becomes Friday in the blink of an eye so I need to add Saturday and Sunday to the work schedule in order to get shit done.
My studio is halfway across town, which is a 20 minute Uber ride. I spend the morning ramping up with coffee, then scrounging around for anything that doesn’t even remotely resemble a taco (yes, one can actually tire of tacos). Once that’s all accomplished and I’ve rolled up the triple-locked, absurdly heavy roll-up door and seat myself before my messy menagerie that is supposed to be my work table, I’m already exhausted but just dig in and go for it…clueless to what the outcome will be. I can’t imagine how much more productive I’d be if I was even a shred as organized as you. It’s inspiring.
Sounds like I need to find just a little more motivation to add the climb of the 17 step spiral stairs to my yoga mat and a notebook or two to my routine. Thank you.
Having an open mind is so crucial! My set-in-its-way brain can push me towards a complete melt down over dirty dishes. Part of me knows how ridiculous that is, but that part of me believes the path of least resistance is best, so we scramble to get all the things done. Fatalistic and fallible, my life, too, is zooming past. When things begin clanging too loudly in the front of my brain, I remind myself that none of it really matters. Deep breathes in and out. Zen it out, step back, get a look at the bigger picture. I look so forward to the Substack. Book jacket, you said? How wonderful!
My routine is my saviour, I work only three days a week but that is enough now I m 63. I use a great deal of anxiety soothing techniques and self soothing. I look forward to hearing from your neck of the woods, so different from our little Mediterranean climate by the southern ocean. There was a big Antarctic penguin on the beach this week and my wife and I saw three dolphins and a fur seal. Thanks for the Lung Neko.
As an AuDHDer, I can relate to the food prep part for sure. So important, otherwise I'll just eat 17 pounds of trail mix per day within one 45 minute span then nothing the rest of the time, lol. Exercise is important for my racing brain too... although I never seem to realize it until it's too late, of course. Perhaps one day I will plan in advance. 🙃
For me the biggest thing is trying to find wind-down time each day to relax and journal/read/etc, which can be hard when I'm hyperfocused on a project and tell myself I'd rather work 18 hours a day on it but spoiler alert, my body does not want to. :)
So much of this resonates: I need notebooks and not folders ( those are coffins for paper) I meal prepped a bunch of hippie food and split pea soup to nourish and balance my body with the busy. Most of all, I routinely have to cut my hair out of the vacuum too. Nice to know I’m not alone.
The most helpful thing I've learned since my late Autistic diagnosis is about "superpowers." To be clear I don't believe any of that bullshit about neurodivergent people having superpowers, but metaphorically it works because of how many of us have aptitudes or intense focus that creates a unique hyperskill (is that an actual word? I don't know. But anyway...). My therapist told me a story about when he took a creative writing class and when the teacher critiqued a story he wrote about a superhero, advised him that to ring true, any narrative about "super" powers has to have a balancing down-side. Every skill, aptitude, talent, etc. has an energetic cost, and if we don't accept and honor that, life will not be sustainable. It's no fun paying the superpower tax when it comes due, but it's better than the neuro crash and burn that happens if we don't. We are only human, after all. That awareness is what has helped me learn better how to navigate the requirements of living in a culture not designed with my type of brain in mind.
I really love this post. Bundles of cat fur and a strand of mistakenly sucked up yarn( cat toy) destroyed my vacuum last week. Very much looking forward to your new music, and of course I'll be in Dallas to see the April show. Your music has always been a series of indelibly impressed memory markers in my life extending back to 2002. There's no doubt I will never grow tired of listening. Thank you for what you do.
It helps that I have always been a bit absent-minded. In the Army in the field I would keep rifles, working knives, compass and anything else I might want to use and put down on parachute cord tied to my body. So, I have learned to take it a bit slower; if I misplace something, I stop looking and think about it. I try to compartmentalize. If I can't remember a name or a lyric or whatever else, I just consciously wait and it comes back.
I too have an ADHD brain paired with my husband's AuDHD brain. Honestly, loving him has taught me more patience and compassion with myself. It can be a magical thing to be paired with someone who has some of the same struggles you do (extremely frustrating at times, too).
By the by, I can't wait to hear more of the new album! I am recording my first solo album right now and you are my #1 inspiration, Neko!
As someone diagnosed in adulthood with ADHD and ASD, it’s so great of you to share. It really helps us when we struggle to know we’re not alone, and that there are so many similar folks doing so many amazing things. I already feel like I end every comment with a huge and sincere “thank you”, but…thank you. That goes out to Jeff and all of the creatures as well. ✌️
The speed of the passage of time is something that really gets to me when I think about it too much. The physicists will tell you time is an illusion, that everything that will happen has happened already and will happen again. The author of Ecclesiastes seems to agree with them, more or less, so they may well be right. But the IRS still wants my tax return by April 15th and I still miss the baby versions of my children. And when I go to the dentist, the minutes turn to hours. It’s not fair.
You’re so right on about the speed of time this year. Weeks fly by like nights. I’ve never experienced this. Maybe it has something to do with turning sixty. SIXTY!
Who? Me?
Monday becomes Friday in the blink of an eye so I need to add Saturday and Sunday to the work schedule in order to get shit done.
My studio is halfway across town, which is a 20 minute Uber ride. I spend the morning ramping up with coffee, then scrounging around for anything that doesn’t even remotely resemble a taco (yes, one can actually tire of tacos). Once that’s all accomplished and I’ve rolled up the triple-locked, absurdly heavy roll-up door and seat myself before my messy menagerie that is supposed to be my work table, I’m already exhausted but just dig in and go for it…clueless to what the outcome will be. I can’t imagine how much more productive I’d be if I was even a shred as organized as you. It’s inspiring.
Sounds like I need to find just a little more motivation to add the climb of the 17 step spiral stairs to my yoga mat and a notebook or two to my routine. Thank you.
Having an open mind is so crucial! My set-in-its-way brain can push me towards a complete melt down over dirty dishes. Part of me knows how ridiculous that is, but that part of me believes the path of least resistance is best, so we scramble to get all the things done. Fatalistic and fallible, my life, too, is zooming past. When things begin clanging too loudly in the front of my brain, I remind myself that none of it really matters. Deep breathes in and out. Zen it out, step back, get a look at the bigger picture. I look so forward to the Substack. Book jacket, you said? How wonderful!
Virgo-mania. Yes. Used wisely can set everything to right.
I appreciate it so much when you share about your Neurodivergent experience. It gives me hope!
My routine is my saviour, I work only three days a week but that is enough now I m 63. I use a great deal of anxiety soothing techniques and self soothing. I look forward to hearing from your neck of the woods, so different from our little Mediterranean climate by the southern ocean. There was a big Antarctic penguin on the beach this week and my wife and I saw three dolphins and a fur seal. Thanks for the Lung Neko.
As an AuDHDer, I can relate to the food prep part for sure. So important, otherwise I'll just eat 17 pounds of trail mix per day within one 45 minute span then nothing the rest of the time, lol. Exercise is important for my racing brain too... although I never seem to realize it until it's too late, of course. Perhaps one day I will plan in advance. 🙃
For me the biggest thing is trying to find wind-down time each day to relax and journal/read/etc, which can be hard when I'm hyperfocused on a project and tell myself I'd rather work 18 hours a day on it but spoiler alert, my body does not want to. :)
As an AuDHDer, my brain constantly seeks out chaos and then gets overwhelmed by it. It's... interesting.
“…keep open to change…” words to live by, words to keep one sane.
So much of this resonates: I need notebooks and not folders ( those are coffins for paper) I meal prepped a bunch of hippie food and split pea soup to nourish and balance my body with the busy. Most of all, I routinely have to cut my hair out of the vacuum too. Nice to know I’m not alone.
The most helpful thing I've learned since my late Autistic diagnosis is about "superpowers." To be clear I don't believe any of that bullshit about neurodivergent people having superpowers, but metaphorically it works because of how many of us have aptitudes or intense focus that creates a unique hyperskill (is that an actual word? I don't know. But anyway...). My therapist told me a story about when he took a creative writing class and when the teacher critiqued a story he wrote about a superhero, advised him that to ring true, any narrative about "super" powers has to have a balancing down-side. Every skill, aptitude, talent, etc. has an energetic cost, and if we don't accept and honor that, life will not be sustainable. It's no fun paying the superpower tax when it comes due, but it's better than the neuro crash and burn that happens if we don't. We are only human, after all. That awareness is what has helped me learn better how to navigate the requirements of living in a culture not designed with my type of brain in mind.
I really love this post. Bundles of cat fur and a strand of mistakenly sucked up yarn( cat toy) destroyed my vacuum last week. Very much looking forward to your new music, and of course I'll be in Dallas to see the April show. Your music has always been a series of indelibly impressed memory markers in my life extending back to 2002. There's no doubt I will never grow tired of listening. Thank you for what you do.
It helps that I have always been a bit absent-minded. In the Army in the field I would keep rifles, working knives, compass and anything else I might want to use and put down on parachute cord tied to my body. So, I have learned to take it a bit slower; if I misplace something, I stop looking and think about it. I try to compartmentalize. If I can't remember a name or a lyric or whatever else, I just consciously wait and it comes back.
I so get it. I spent the last two weeks making Creole Crab and Fish Cakes. One medium over egg on top for breakfast, champions, it is.