Sitting in the studio in a dark control room at Carnassial Sound. There is no natural light that gets in. The day flies by and I am a little disappointed when I go out to the front room and it’s already dark. I have been so sad this week because of more death. I’m not gonna get into it but it has me cut off at the knees. Luckily Paul Rigby just got here and he is working on guitars and tomorrow I will be too. It’s like singing with your fingers but I’m much better at singing with my mouth so I’m a little lazy about guitar. I’m trying to change that. “The Lazy Guitar” is now my gunfighter name. When it comes to playing I am rhythm only. I have never been interested in single notes or scales. I want to make texture and to play drums on the strings. It feels like freedom. I am in love with the sensation.
I love your gunfighter name, Neko. I’m often asked if I have an “Indian” name. It’s a ceremony I haven’t undertaken yet that I have mixed feelings about. Nonetheless, I hope it’s “Sweater without Pants Man” because I’m built like a Buffalo and Buffalo look like they wear sweaters without pants. Look at one now and tell me I’m wrong!
As for my skill, I love often and unrepentantly and ferociously.
Thank you for writing this. Your descriptions of whatever you describe always resonate so strongly for me. My most cherished skill is survival with my soul intact - weathering the cruelties of life in the time and place where I exist, and embracing my anger at it all, without surrendering to hatred and bitterness. As it so happens, I've been obsessed with "Last Lion of Albion" lately, and though I've always liked the song, it is suddenly resonating much more strongly for me. I figured out why just yesterday: I feel like I'm going instinct. It's sort of a nonsensical feeling because there's never been more than one of me; nevertheless, that's how I feel. So while I would never wish this on you or anyone else, witnessing your grief about the looming extinction of musicians is healing in some small way (as I don't feel quite so all alone in my feeling), so I thank you for sharing your experience with us all. Since this coming Friday is the Day of Remembrance for disabled people forced into extinction by their own families (if you're curious, google disability-memorial.org), this small relief is no small thing. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
At this point most of your friends are mere acquaintances of mine - at most, but even then their passing stings like they’re family. Is it possible to be empathetic and a narcissist?Text or call if’n you want to chat about those precious bird-like hands (***)599-0423.
I read that Brian Eno wanted to work with David Byrne because he played the guitar like a percussionist. It changed the way I heard Byrnes music ever since. Thank you for the additional insight. Makes perfect sense. Can’t wait to hear your new work, Neko!
I'm so sorry Neko...about "death." I'm headed to Burlington tomorrow to say goodbye to an old friend who's losing the cancer battle and I'm reminded of my mom's similar battle, so this sadness is strong for me right now too.
I've got few precious skills, but I do make a damn fine croissant!
Listening to music keeps me grounded, hope making it does the same for you.
I feel the death of artists, as well. I see it. I just gave up being a visual artist due to it being so crushing. Having to fight people who have excess money to put their art print on every piece of merch there is and sell it for the bare minimum, and fighting people who say…”oh, I can just get a logo from an app now” or “AI can generate it for me.” So many people are willing to pay more for a plain white wall than they are for a mural. As I said, it’s crushing. I’m just a painter, who painted on walls and canvas for money. While everyone says to join the capitalism….its not for me. Most of the things you can have your art printed on seem so cheap to me and disposable. More trash for the dump in a year or two. And I care about what’s happening with the climate as here in MT we have had a WARM winter. It’s not right. My XC skis didn’t even make it out this year in exchange for dirt road walks. So, I’ve chosen to stop making my art for the people and it’s now just for me as a hobby. Off to “real job” applications….also in the name of capitalism. But, maybe in a few months I can get off of the ramen + egg diet I’ve been living off of for a while now. That’s I guess the difference. Food. I wish I could have made it. But so few of us do. Cheers to you for continuing the fight. This fan is extremely proud of you. Rock on sister!!!! Looking forward to seeing you when you come through.
Also, Thank you for writing this blog!! It’s great to read one of my hero’s also is a real person persevering through all this mess we used to call the future. (Feels like replays of the past sometimes). It brings light into my world even though sometimes you express you are feeling down.
Thank you for the way you share these raw feelings. For those of us that find it easier to breathe through your music, our understanding and empathy of the process makes it resonate even closer to our hearts. Big love to you, amig@.
Percussive guitarists are awesome to play with! Anything you can strike is technically percussion. So, sorry horns and winds, you’re out! Really looking forward to hearing the new songs, and it sounds more like commitment than self importance to me. ❤️
Have to say the main skill is keeping my head in face of adversity. From working my best whenever under immense deadline conditions in days when I was employed. Fellow employees in art department all around me were grumbling messes. Not me. I revelled in the challenge. And of course if an overtime Saturday rush. The donuts the supervisor treated us to were a plus!
But deadline rushes were walk in the park compared to a bit over three years ago when eviction, losing most all life's possessions, deciding to snuff it and standing at a bridge railing at a 450 foot drop. A few tentative leans forward in the black of night and I realized what selfish absurdity it was the position I was in figuratively AND literally.
I began to make my standard black comedic jokes, only never so self deprecating as usually were. Realized how much I loved humor and laffing. I'd miss it. I lived for it. Was gonna be tough as shit, life now, but id face and live it.
And some weeks back my heart health finally got rather wonky. Shit happens. But ya know what? Deal with it, asshole. Been a homeless bum living in your vehicle over three years. Faced self destruction. Hell. Been clean and sober 17 years.
You've kicked yer own ass... With luck when you do it'll move you forward.
So yeah, I'd have to say facing ones adversities is one helluva precious skill.
Thanks for shedding more light on how music can be both something we play at (in terms of ‘an activity done for the fun of the experience’) and also be something we work at.
As a fellow rhythm-only player, I love your perspective on that! More Alex Van Halen than Eddie, I just have six strings instead of six toms (he probably had six, right? Seems like he would)
Lazy Guitar, I enjoy your writing and appreciate your willingness to lay bare your work, your art . So much of what you write resonates with me. And your music is a beautiful expression and experience. I must draw a line in the sand regarding conduits and vessels though. I'm not a fighter unless I have to and beliefs are beautiful because we can live and let live with them. So as you pass my rocking chair I acknowledge your beauty and autonomy and agency, and cast a gentle eye of disagreement. Keep on and I look forward to a Minneapolis performance. Peace
I love your gunfighter name, Neko. I’m often asked if I have an “Indian” name. It’s a ceremony I haven’t undertaken yet that I have mixed feelings about. Nonetheless, I hope it’s “Sweater without Pants Man” because I’m built like a Buffalo and Buffalo look like they wear sweaters without pants. Look at one now and tell me I’m wrong!
As for my skill, I love often and unrepentantly and ferociously.
Thank you for writing this. Your descriptions of whatever you describe always resonate so strongly for me. My most cherished skill is survival with my soul intact - weathering the cruelties of life in the time and place where I exist, and embracing my anger at it all, without surrendering to hatred and bitterness. As it so happens, I've been obsessed with "Last Lion of Albion" lately, and though I've always liked the song, it is suddenly resonating much more strongly for me. I figured out why just yesterday: I feel like I'm going instinct. It's sort of a nonsensical feeling because there's never been more than one of me; nevertheless, that's how I feel. So while I would never wish this on you or anyone else, witnessing your grief about the looming extinction of musicians is healing in some small way (as I don't feel quite so all alone in my feeling), so I thank you for sharing your experience with us all. Since this coming Friday is the Day of Remembrance for disabled people forced into extinction by their own families (if you're curious, google disability-memorial.org), this small relief is no small thing. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
At this point most of your friends are mere acquaintances of mine - at most, but even then their passing stings like they’re family. Is it possible to be empathetic and a narcissist?Text or call if’n you want to chat about those precious bird-like hands (***)599-0423.
Miss you!
I read that Brian Eno wanted to work with David Byrne because he played the guitar like a percussionist. It changed the way I heard Byrnes music ever since. Thank you for the additional insight. Makes perfect sense. Can’t wait to hear your new work, Neko!
I'm so sorry Neko...about "death." I'm headed to Burlington tomorrow to say goodbye to an old friend who's losing the cancer battle and I'm reminded of my mom's similar battle, so this sadness is strong for me right now too.
I've got few precious skills, but I do make a damn fine croissant!
Listening to music keeps me grounded, hope making it does the same for you.
I feel the death of artists, as well. I see it. I just gave up being a visual artist due to it being so crushing. Having to fight people who have excess money to put their art print on every piece of merch there is and sell it for the bare minimum, and fighting people who say…”oh, I can just get a logo from an app now” or “AI can generate it for me.” So many people are willing to pay more for a plain white wall than they are for a mural. As I said, it’s crushing. I’m just a painter, who painted on walls and canvas for money. While everyone says to join the capitalism….its not for me. Most of the things you can have your art printed on seem so cheap to me and disposable. More trash for the dump in a year or two. And I care about what’s happening with the climate as here in MT we have had a WARM winter. It’s not right. My XC skis didn’t even make it out this year in exchange for dirt road walks. So, I’ve chosen to stop making my art for the people and it’s now just for me as a hobby. Off to “real job” applications….also in the name of capitalism. But, maybe in a few months I can get off of the ramen + egg diet I’ve been living off of for a while now. That’s I guess the difference. Food. I wish I could have made it. But so few of us do. Cheers to you for continuing the fight. This fan is extremely proud of you. Rock on sister!!!! Looking forward to seeing you when you come through.
Also, Thank you for writing this blog!! It’s great to read one of my hero’s also is a real person persevering through all this mess we used to call the future. (Feels like replays of the past sometimes). It brings light into my world even though sometimes you express you are feeling down.
Thank you for the way you share these raw feelings. For those of us that find it easier to breathe through your music, our understanding and empathy of the process makes it resonate even closer to our hearts. Big love to you, amig@.
My guitar name is Adequate Adelaidean and my skill is blending in like a chameleon.
Percussive guitarists are awesome to play with! Anything you can strike is technically percussion. So, sorry horns and winds, you’re out! Really looking forward to hearing the new songs, and it sounds more like commitment than self importance to me. ❤️
Have to say the main skill is keeping my head in face of adversity. From working my best whenever under immense deadline conditions in days when I was employed. Fellow employees in art department all around me were grumbling messes. Not me. I revelled in the challenge. And of course if an overtime Saturday rush. The donuts the supervisor treated us to were a plus!
But deadline rushes were walk in the park compared to a bit over three years ago when eviction, losing most all life's possessions, deciding to snuff it and standing at a bridge railing at a 450 foot drop. A few tentative leans forward in the black of night and I realized what selfish absurdity it was the position I was in figuratively AND literally.
I began to make my standard black comedic jokes, only never so self deprecating as usually were. Realized how much I loved humor and laffing. I'd miss it. I lived for it. Was gonna be tough as shit, life now, but id face and live it.
And some weeks back my heart health finally got rather wonky. Shit happens. But ya know what? Deal with it, asshole. Been a homeless bum living in your vehicle over three years. Faced self destruction. Hell. Been clean and sober 17 years.
You've kicked yer own ass... With luck when you do it'll move you forward.
So yeah, I'd have to say facing ones adversities is one helluva precious skill.
Thanks for shedding more light on how music can be both something we play at (in terms of ‘an activity done for the fun of the experience’) and also be something we work at.
As a fellow rhythm-only player, I love your perspective on that! More Alex Van Halen than Eddie, I just have six strings instead of six toms (he probably had six, right? Seems like he would)
This really resonated - the feeling, knowing of a skill or knowledge going extinct. Not quite last of my kind, but getting close.
(Hesitant to put my skill in words, to dispell what is still a little magic to me)
Lazy Guitar, I enjoy your writing and appreciate your willingness to lay bare your work, your art . So much of what you write resonates with me. And your music is a beautiful expression and experience. I must draw a line in the sand regarding conduits and vessels though. I'm not a fighter unless I have to and beliefs are beautiful because we can live and let live with them. So as you pass my rocking chair I acknowledge your beauty and autonomy and agency, and cast a gentle eye of disagreement. Keep on and I look forward to a Minneapolis performance. Peace
Beautiful tokens… love them both, love the Ol’ Pueblo, too. Annnd… LOVE great rhythm guitar! Love yours, love Bob Weir’s! Musicians will live forever.
Now I know you, rider. But we can’t go extinct, it’s in “the soup”! It does take lovely work, tho, to stir.